I AM NOT ALONE!

Everyday waking up to a feeling of throwing up feels sick!! The last couple of months has been just of that and a lot more! Tired, hungry, tired, giddy, tired, off to work, tired, back from work, of course tired!! Gone were the days when I could Pack up for a two days trip and hop into my frd’s car in 15 mins!!! I swear dint miss a thing and looked smarter than my boys ;) Here I was dragging myself to get ready for the cab that was gonna reach me in 1 hour. There dint go a day when I said to my mom with those puppy eyes “Mom I cant! Can I quit!!” my mommy patiently replied “no my love! You are almost thru with the tough days! Hardly few more days!” I am scared to ask the same Q to my dad. Me being daddy’s pet….expected and obvious answer is “Quit! I am here for you. All of mine is yours”. Now that was the most soothening words I was desperate to here but then came the next haunting Q. My love….my little angle will one day grow up to hear the stories of how she/he was brought home. He might have a better talent in throwing those puppy eyes his mommy has and might ask “Mom if dad dint pay….who paid?” I wanted to look into her glowing eyes and say “your mommy is a super mom!! You owe nothing to anyone!”

Lets count the blessings…..I can now feel my angel’s flutters!! Not very obvious and not very often but she does tell me “Mom I am here” now and then! I now know I AM NOT ALONE!! He wakes me night with his notorious movements…and I just simply love it!!! My cutie pie moves around and makes me wonder what is he upto? Hmmm sliding games? Hide and seek? Extremely excited for sure! Though there is so much of tiredness and sickness its just nothing when I do anything for my love! I read him books….I sing lullabies for him. I put an extra hour everyday to learn some new songs. I just know she is hearing. She tells me if she doesn’t like the song. She has an all-time favorite….”tooguve rangana”.

When I think of those cute little pink feet that’s kicking me from the inside and the chubby cheeks and curled hands and a thumb in his mouth…..I just can’t hold the tears…who wants to hold it anyways!